Hey There! Oh, Isolation is being Re-Written! If you want to see the original story (for whatever reason), a Google Doc is available here!
The rust builds over a while, but you'll never notice the changes as they happen. The harsh grains of oxidized pain and discomfort will latch to you, anywhere you touch the world. It will stick to others. Sometimes. It will take space in your mind, your heart and your soul, if you believe you have one. It will tear your skin taught. Wound you. Seal the wounds. And then wound you again.
...
...
...Joshua?
...
Joshua, say something. Say something to It'kara at least.
There's nothing to say.
...Is there anything to think about then? Anything to mull over?
...Would you tell me if there was?
Shouldn't you already know that?
...What is that supposed to mean?
"We'll still be keeping a close eye on you," It'kara says, ending the silence in the pod. "Especially after so many people left that place. We estimate there should be approximately a month's worth of food in there for you and everyone left, provided nothing expires earlier than we expect."
Joshua glances at them from the left. Barely even turning his head. It'kara pauses at this. Or maybe they're expecting Joshua to say something, I can't really tell. But they speak again after a bit.
"If you have an emergency, you can expect to see someone come down for you. You won't even have to call us or anything." That last sentence is let out with a stifled laugh. It seems to be more for It'kara's benefit than Joshua's, and barely at that; the mood does not pick up. Galvana's a few hundred feet away. Closing in. Joshua still isn't saying anything.
The pod touches down, softly as ever, and the wall opens up towards the fake city. Joshua gingerly steps out, and starts walking through the sand.
"Bran and 'Ichael are worried about you, Joshua," It'kara says as they follow him out. "You probably already knew that but... they want the best for you."
Joshua turns his head to face them. Finally.
"I don't think you coming back here by yourself is a good idea, even if I'm bringing you here. But I won't stop you. If you really just want space."
"This is my only home."
The words just fell out. It didn't even feel like they were spoken. They held no weight on their own.
"That's... not true," It'kara said, trying to consider their words carefully. "You'll always be welcome in the ship."
Joshua let out a sharp exhale, something akin to a laugh. Then he turned to the gate and started walking.
He didn't even get three steps out before the gate started opening, freezing him in place briefly. He continued walking as the machinery's noise drowned out the world, but at a slower pace, not knowing why anybody would open this thing for him.
As the door finally opens, nobody seems to be behind as far as Joshua can see.
But then the doors fully retract, and on Joshua's right, he sees him again.
Marshal Brier.
It'kara rushes up in front of Joshua and pushes him back. He can feel their hand shaking as he watches the Marshal watching Joshua back.
The man is the worst he's ever looked so far; his hair is all over the place, what parts of him aren't covered in sand are barely covered by his ragged excuse for clothes that almost leave him naked from the waist up, and he's not even wearing shoes anymore. His feet must be scabbing from the hot sand.
Also... he doesn't have any more medals on him. They're all gone. Nothing to reflect the sun into Joshua's eyes anymore. In fact, the only part glaring at Joshua now is the Marshal's eyes. They're barely doing that as they almost look dead with how close they are to being shut.
The soft wind is the only thing other than the Marshal's heavy breathing that Joshua can hear. Other than It'kara's shaking coming to a stop as they calm down, the scene doesn't change for a while, as the Marshal just moves his eyes between the two of them.
Suddenly, he starts moving towards them. Slowly. Dragging his left foot as it only slightly raises from the sand, cutting through the quiet. He comes up to It'kara's side, looking them up and down. He looks small, by comparison.
About as small as 'John' did.
"You're an alien," he finally says, in a horse voice.
It'kara doesn't reply at first. Probably stunned. "Yeah" is the only response that comes out after so long.
The Marshal then walks ahead a bit and looks up at the ship, the pod not yet retreated. He turns to look back at It'kara. "You took my men? Up there?"
"They came to the ship on their own," It'kara replied almost immediately. There was authority in their voice that Joshua hadn't heard before. It was intimidating. "They originally came to attack us, but then disarmed themselves after speaking with some of their own people."
The Marshal needed to catch his breath a bit. "Some of... their own..."
"They said they were clerks when they came to our ship, before the pris-- the soldiers came."
"Ah," he sighed out, recognizing whom It'kara was talking about immediately. "So that's where the bastards went." He touches his left eye, which Joshua notices in the light is actually bruised black. "Almost killed me for no reason," he mutters to himself.
They know?? The General... Riand... They already knew everybody left??
"Then what's he?" he says, pointing over to Joshua. "A pet, or something?"
"Of course not," It'kara plainly replies. No mention of what Joshua's doing back here after Brier definitely saw him leaving to the ship earlier.
"So what?" Brier continues. "He's just going... wherever he wants?"
It'kara doesn't answer. Joshua doesn't say anything himself, but after some hesitation, makes a small nod. The Marshal doesn't acknowledge him, however, and continues looking back to the ship. Eventually, he lets out a labored sigh, and turns back to It'kara.
"What are you waiting for then?" he says, before presenting his wrists forwards towards It'kara in surrender. "Take me in already."
Joshua can feel It'kara's face contort in apprehension. "You won't... fight me?"
"What would be the point?" the Marshal replies as he lowers his arms, dropping lazily to his sides and swaying a bit. "No army. Nobody to... run anything... I'm done with this fucking war." He sadly drags himself into the pod and falls onto the seat on the left before repositioning himself. "I'd rather die a prisoner now."
It'kara looks back to Joshua as uncertainty crosses between the both of them. Joshua glances at the Marshal, It'kara to the walled city. It'kara then grabs Joshua's shoulders firmly.
"We'll watch out for you. Okay?"
Joshua is barely registering the reassurance. Instead his head is full to bursting with the Marshal's choice to just... leave.
He gave up.
Everybody gave up.
Except for Bran and 'Ichael.
No... they gave up. A long time ago.
...
Okay Joshua, you need to explain yourself. What are you talking about when you say 'gave up' here?
On this place. What else could I be talking about?
'This place' is "Galvana". "Galvana" is the last Fascist holdout in the world. You heard it from Sarah firsthand. You've seen the 'houses' in this place, they're all fake! Nothing about this place is worth believing in!
It's my home.
Yeah, because you were kidnapped as a baby! Bran was too, but he's trying to leave! He's trying to get you to leave too! Nobody should have to live in that situation!
I've spent my entire life here.
So far, yeah. But you don't have to--
Along with so many others. And they all just... leave? Nobody will fight for this place?
Wha...? Joshua, there's noth--
Why am I the only person who cares?? I'm the only person fighting with himself to stay here?! Make things work?!? I'M A SOLDIER!! ONE GOD-DAMNED SOLDIER!!!
Joshua, stop it!!
I CAN'T DO EVERYTHING THAT KEEPS THIS PLACE RUNNING!!!!
A scream fills the world... and dies on the wind. Once again, Joshua is alone; the pod is gone, It'kara and Marshal, Bran and 'Ichael... everyone is gone.
...
Joshua... please...try to stay calm. We can still go to the ship if things get too much. That's where Bran and 'Ichael are. They didn't leave you, they just want you to be okay. And this place is clearly not okay for you.
...
Take whatever time you need here to... gather yourself, but this place is not going to help you in the long term. You've always known that.
...
You did know that, right?
...
...
Joshua, are you listening to me?
Wha-- Joshua, where are you going?
The other barrack.
Why?
There has to be something I missed.
What the hell are you talking about?
Everything is going wrong. There has to be a reason for it. Why everyone is just leaving.
Joshua, everyone is leaving because this place has been nothing but a fascist holdover. You are a child who was kidnapped over 20 years ago, along with Bran, 'Ichael and everyone else you know. The kids don't want to fight anymore, and the kidnappers have no more power to fight back with. The only people who 'gave up' are the people who never had anything to believe in other than their own power. There is nothing to believe in here. No future for you or anyone else.
...That can't be right.
What? Why?? Why CAN'T that be right? And why are you saying this after seeming to believe in Bran and everyone else?
I said what they wanted me to say, dumbass.
No, Joshua; You BELIEVED those words. I was in your head. I AM part of you.
No you're not.
YES I AM.
Then what am I thinking right now?
...
You're... you're thinking all of this. Right now. What kind of question is that?
I'm thinking about the physical sensation this conversation gives me. That THESE conversations give me. It's horrible. Every time. It has a texture to it I can't get rid of. It started the day you started talking to me and it's built up after all these years. I can't even tell where I end and you begin anymore. You keep inserting these thoughts into me--these thoughts that fight against everything I've ever known--and it makes me feel sick.
...
...Joshua, what are you... You've shared my perspective plenty of times! The only real times we haven't is when you've disassociated, when you're losing your grounding and stressed!
No, I... I push you out! That's what that is!
It feels like that because it's a defense mechanism! It's a shit one, but... You're in uncomfortable ground now. But it doesn't have to be. You just need to let your mind open up more--
See, THERE IT IS AGAIN!! The fucking thoughts! I'm NOT thinking about this! I REFUSE to think this shit! But you keep bringing it back!
Goddammit Joshua I AM YOU!!! What about this is so fucking hard to understand!?!!?
...
Joshua, answer me. Stop walking to the barrack and talk.
Eventually he stops. His eyes are focused on the ground in front of him, a few yards or so away from the ruins. Finally.
But he's still not talking. Instead, after a little while, he kneels down. and starts unzipping something. The pack from last time? The one Bran was checking out?
He's taking something from the smallest pocket. He checks it out in his hand, turning it around, making the longer bits flop around. Is it a doll? A kind of toy?
Joshua, what are you doing with it?
...
Joshua. Please say something to me. Think something, at least. I'm just a part of your head, I only experience things in this world you experience. All of these things I'm telling you are coming directly from you; Your worries, your desires. I'm not trying to hurt you.
...
Joshua's walking away from the barracks, doll in hand. Not saying anything. The world around him feels so distant, so much like the memories he has of living here. Like the people he's known all his life, the people he calls family. The people he probably needs the most right now. The people I can't do anything to bring him to.
He walks into the Tower, probably looking for General Wellers Cormack and Riand. It will not end well. I don't know if Joshua cares.
I can already Imagine Wellers acting out Riand's rage for him, knocking Joshua to the floor. He might not even give Joshua the opportunity to say anything, seeing every building so empty.
The elevator takes no time to get to Riand's office. Wellers and Riand are talking, but I can't tell about what. Probably doesn't matter, even with as angry Wellers appears to be.
"Sirs!" Joshua announces, finally breaking his silence. He stands at attention while Riand and Wellers slowly turn their gaze to him. Riand's face is as dead as it usually is, but Wellers... He looks ready to strangle someone to death. "I believe the aliens have manipulated the Marshall into leaving for the ship above us!" Joshua continues
"Oh, is that where the shit-heel went," Wellers replies, what little of his tone I can pick up on indicating that he already guessed this. "Well good for him. Saw the writing on the wall for himself before I showed him his place. Bastard's had it good here for too long."
"Couldn't rely on the boy when it came to defending Galvana as an institution, shouldn't have trusted him with military duties," Riand says in a tired voice. He's not even looking at anybody in particular when he says it, just over to his side. "He was convenient."
Wellers rolls his eyes and waves his hand dismissively at Riand as he walks towards the large window overlooking the town. He lifts his head to look at the lower tip of the double-ended obelisk in the sky, rubbing his chin. "I don't understand... What could these things want with him in the first place?" He turns back to Riand. "I doubt they'd care if I was going to kill him myself."
"They think they can find a use for him, let them try. Waste of time," Riand continues. It feels like he's talking more to himself than anything else, sitting on his chair in his own little corner of the room. What does Joshua see in this man?
"I think the natives are behind it, sirs."
Joshua's words surprise me and everyone else in the room, finally seeming to make both Wellers and Riand fully acknowledging his existence.
"I found this doll not too long ago in town," he continues, pulling out the doll--
Wait.
Do I recognize this doll?
...
Wellers takes it out of his hand, looking it over. It's not clear if he shares Joshua's conclusion about its origin, but after long enough, he starts looking at Joshua. Well, staring at him more like. Not saying anything himself. Just staring.
Honestly, if I had eyes, I'd start staring too. I don't like where this seems to be going.
"If they come again, we must stand our ground," Riand continues, still not speaking to a specific person. "If Galvana must fall, it must be on our terms."
Joshua looks over to him but nothing comes of it. The man's words might as well have never been spoken.
Suddenly, Joshua is lifted by his arm by Wellers.
"Are you loyal? To the end?"
Joshua looks scared, as he should be. But soon enough he gives his answer.
"Yes, sir."